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Ali Oetjen Exclusive: 'Dear Bullies'

The former Bachelorette pens a letter to her trolls. - by Ali Oetjen
  • 22 Feb 2019
Ali Oetjen Exclusive: 'Dear Bullies'

Dear Bullies,

Are we in a courtroom where you are the judge?

Sometimes that's what it feels like, when I want to share my perspective, my message on MY social platform it's a nerve racking experience to say the least because the jury may simply not like what I've got to say and I've always got to be prepared for that.

But don't for a second think you can pass judgement and send me to hell because I'm normally too strong for that. 

Ali oetjen before and after

The original image vs the edited version of a photo Ali was trolled for.

Instagram

I understand that we all have a right to our opinions, but the fact is I haven't come into YOUR courtroom to be judged, I'm in my own safe environment where I'm entitled to share my voice with my friends and network who decide to follow me & you invade it with negativity, non-constructive negativity.

Normally I'm a big enough person to understand that you obviously have your own problems as we all do and you have a harder time in trying to control them, which I understand, but would you please consider other peoples feelings when doing it? Repetitive passing judgement, 1) makes your own mindset negative and sends you down a negative spiral, 2) is annoying, hurts and kills.

alioetjen View Profile
17.7k likes - View Post on Instagram
I started my workout at 5am this morning, earlier than usual because I couldn't sleep. I couldn't sleep because online bullies comments hurt AND I disliked how so many comments on my recent post were right. I asked myself, why wasn't my original photo good enough to share with the world?! At the time I thought, this photo of my face is not "pretty enough" I have an image to uphold & must make it look flawless! Crap! It made me feel sh*t!! I don't want to conform, I want to continue to inspire real women to love themselves for the bloody breathtaking beings that we are. This is me at this VERY moment, no make up, no filters or edits and I'm scared sh*tless to upload it, but want too so I prove my point that real is better, to share with you that I'm nowhere near perfect & that we all have similar feelings. I'm scared because I think I'll let ppl down(don't know who they are btw!!), be judged, compared & ridiculed by the media. I have the same inhibitions/insecurities as every other woman out there. I believe we all have our good and bad days(hopefully mostly good) but on the bad days like TODAY I cry because I'm not confident 24/7, I'm vulnerable, fragile & sensitive. . To the bullies out there; I'm more engaged with my followers online than ever because of my business & so I read comments, react & reply. On my 'good days' my mindset stays strong that people's comments are only a reflection of themselves. But on my bad days they HURT. This isn't a post for anyone to feel sorry for me BUT it IS a post to inspire women to know that we're all good enough Just. The. Way. We. Are & we're all in it together!!!!! We all share the same feelings & energies surrounding body image, self image, self love and we all know it comes down to our inner light & inner beauty. I'm not flawless, I'm not perfect, I don't love myself everyday the way I should but I try & control my thoughts & resort back to knowing my worth. Comment with your favourite coloured heart below to share with YOURSELF. ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜💖 #selflove #real #unity

You must understand that every decision you make to write a hurtful comment will have some kind of impact, which I'm sure you're well aware of, but IF it's a catastrophic effect, you are the one on trial. 

Believe in your own faith, stand strong by that which obviously involves having an opinion that align with that faith or belief but do not bring others down to make yours stronger!

ali and taite
Brett Brogran for Who Magazine
ali and taite
Brett Brogan for Who Magazine

Be kind and you'll be in a kinder world, be nice and you'll be in a nicer world. If you're hurting, reach out and ask for help because the human race wants to help.

All my love, help, kindness, understanding & concern,

Ali. xo

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