Never let your hubby see you looking disheveled
Victoria and her hot husband David Beckham have been married for 17 years, and she credits at least part of that longevity to effort. “In marriage: have patience. Bite your tongue. Be supportive. And preserve a bit of mystique,” she says. “Never let yourself go completely (at least brush your hair, clean your teeth, have a bit of a brow going on because you will always want him to look at you and feel attracted).”
A little hairspray goes a long way
She tells her teenage self to let “her skin breathe” by wearing less makeup and warns her to never, ever let a makeup artist shave her eyebrows. But there’s one beauty addiction she’ll never overcome. “You will always be addicted to Elnett hairspray but you will tone it down. Less of the ‘Hello! I just got stuck in a wind tunnel’, please.”
Never regret your drag queen style phase
“You are going to have so much fun with your clothes — PVC catsuits; chokers that say absurd things; weird spiky blonde hair. It will never occur to you that you appear ridiculous,” she tells herself. “You will turn up at awards ceremonies resembling a drag queen. But I look back at you and smile. It will add interest to your life to go from one extreme to another. I love the fact that you will feel free to express yourself.”
Always wear sunglasses
She accepts the fact that the day will come she has to “swap heels for Stan Smith trainers” and “minidresses for crisp white shirts” but there’s one thing she should never go without. “… You will never be one of those people who just roll out of bed. Wear sunglasses a lot. Even inside. Especially at airports. They turn a nothing-outfit into something quite pulled together and cool. You are going to really like Aviators. (Then one day you will develop your own!)”
When in doubt, go with sneakers (and never get too chummy with competitive mums)
“A word on school sports day: never wear platform heels and flares if you have to take part in the mothers’ race. And never believe another mum when she says she will stick with you at the back of the race. Because she won’t. And when they announce, ‘It’s the taking part that counts,’ it’s not. It’s all about winning.”
This article originally appeared on PEOPLE.COM.