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In November 2024, James Van Der Beek, who rose to fame as Dawson Leery on Dawson’s Creek announced he had been diagnosed with colorectal cancer.
Now, the actor is taking to Instagram to reflect on the past year, sharing a video titled ‘What Cancer Taught Me.’
“When I was younger, I used to define myself as an actor, which was never all that fulfilling, and then I became a husband and it was much better and then I became a father and that was the ultimate,” he said.
“I could define myself then as a loving, capable, strong, supportive husband, father, provider, steward of the land that we’re so lucky to live on. And for a long time, that felt like a really good definition to the question, ‘Who am I? What am I?’ And then this year, I had to look my own mortality in the eye.”
“I had to come nose to nose with death,” he continued. “And all of those definitions that I cared so deeply about were stripped from me. I was away for treatment, so I could no longer be a husband that was helpful to my wife. I could no longer be a father who could pick up his kids and put them to bed and be there for them. I could not be a provider because I wasn’t working.”
“So I was faced with the question that if I was just here to be a too-skinny, weak guy, alone, in an apartment with cancer, what am I?” James reflected. “I meditated and the answer came through. I am worthy of God’s love, simply because I exist. And if I’m worthy of God’s love, shouldn’t I be worthy of my own?”
The 48-year-old revealed his diagnosis in an interview with People last year, thanking his “incredible family.”
“I have colorectal cancer. I’ve been privately dealing with this diagnosis and have been taking steps to resolve it, with the support of my incredible family,” he told the publication at the time. “There’s reason for optimism, and I’m feeling good,” he added.
In a separate Instagram post, James shared more about his decision to speak out, revealing it hadn’t happened in the way he had hoped.
“Each year, approximately 2 billion people around the world receive this diagnosis. And I’m one of them,” he shared. “There’s no playbook for how announce these things, but I’d planned on talking about it at length with People magazine at some point soon… to raise awareness and tell my story on my own terms. But that plan had to be altered early this morning when I was informed that a tabloid was going to run with the news.
“I’ve been dealing with this privately until now, getting treatment and dialling in my overall health with greater focus than ever before,” the star added. “I’m in a good place and feeling strong. It’s been quite the initiation, and I’ll tell you more when I’m ready.
“Apologies to all the people in my life who I’d planned on telling myself. Nothing about this process has occurred on my preferred timeline… But we roll with it, taking each surprise as a signpost, pointing us toward a greater destiny than we would have discovered without divine intervention.
“Please know that my family and I deeply appreciate all the love and support.”
James and his wife, Kimberly Van Der Beek, are parents to six children: Olivia, 14, Joshua, 12, Annabel, 10, Emilia, 8, Gwendolyn, 6, and Jeremiah, 3.
The pair tied the knot in 2010, with the actor seemingly hinting at his recent cancer diagnosis during an anniversary tribute in August 2024.
“Nothing could have prepared us for this past year – except perhaps the previous 12,” he wrote. “Thank you for being the most incredible partner. You’ve broken me open in spots I didn’t even know were locked, and taught me how to receive more love than I thought possible.”
James previously opened up to Good Morning America about the decision to move his family of eight to Texas in 2020 in search of more space and what he called “a better connection to nature.”
Admitting he was ready to put himself back out there after hitting pause on his Hollywood career, the actor told the publication in 2023 that “this break has been really, really good for me. I think I’ve probably figured out a lot more of who I am and what’s important in these last couple of years.”
