Even Kim Kardashian West gets insecure sometimes.
Sunday night’s episode of Keeping Up with the Kardashians focused largely on the mother of two’s increasingly overwhelming body images issues, which were sparkedafter a set of bikini photos of her on vacation in Mexico in April surfaced in the media, which she said led her to develop “body dysmorphia.”
While in the car on her way to the 2017 Met Gala in New York City in May, Kim, 37, dissolved into a panic over her appearance, which prompted her to start sweating profusely. (No worries, they whipped out a blowdryer in the backseat and cooled her down, even if it meant blowing a fuse.)
“I’m literally going to s— my f—ing pants,” cried Kim, later admitting she “was about to throw up” and “totally had a freakout.”
Back in Los Angeles, family friend Jonathan Cheban pointed out that Kim had developed “a real insecurity problem lately.”
“You should have seen met at the Met. If you think this is bad …” she responded. “The Mexico trip really f—ed up.”
Khloé, 33, jumped to her sister’s defense.
“Kim looked absolutely amazing at the Met Ball … but it seems like the Mexico pictures are just never-ending and it’s just making her think about Paris again, [when she] was mocked and made fun of,” she said. “It’s one of the few times she’s been seen back and out, and this is how she gets treated. It’s not fair and it’s not cool.”
As the days went on, Kim’s insecurities only grew deeper as articles surrounding the Mexico bikini shots continued to circulate.
“When will they stop with this story?” said Kim. “You definitely get a thick skin once you have been through it a lot, but pictures just keep coming up every day and they just won’t let it go. I know I can handle anything and everything, and if I can’t handle it … who can?”
Kim admitted that the media scrutiny was forcing her to stay home more.
“I just am in the house so much that I get so freaked out if anyone like, looks at me,” she said. “[It’s a] full phobia — I freak out about everything.”
“Why do I subject myself to being seen?” she continued. “Why don’t I just stay at home?”
Kourtney, 38, tried to advise Kim to stay off all the gossip websites, but to no avail.
“Kim is really not over these Mexico pictures and I feel like this just set her back,” she said.
“I just feel bad that Kim is now so insecure,” Khloé added. “She literally has the body of a Barbie doll. I get like that, too, and I feel fatter so I feel bad, but I don’t think anyone should live life like that.”
“We need to disconnect from all social media for four days so she remembers how hot she is,” said Cheban, prompting Khloé and Kourtney to devise a plan to help their sister regain some of her confidence.
“Kim is normally not this insecure,” said Kourtney. “If she just didn’t have access to social media or just stopped looking at the blogs, I think that she would start to feel better.”
“I feel like one of the best things she did for herself after her Paris incident was she really detached herself from the internet and social media,” said Khloé. “I think we kind of need to step in and do something like that so she realizes this does not matter, and we take that bulls— out of her life.”
The two decided to secretly wipe all social media apps from Kim’s phone. When Kim she found out, she finally agreed that it was for the best — though she insisted she’s “not like, a lunatic.”
“It consumes you and it affects you,” Kourtney said. “You just need to live your life. Why do you need to see this nonsense?”
Kim tried to argue that she uses the apps to read about current events — “that’s how I learn all my news of what’s going in the world!” — but Kourtney quickly shut her down.
“I don’t read any news, and I’m fine, and I’m happy,” she said.
“I mean, you guys are right,” said Kim, finally coming around. “I do need to let this not bother me and not be a thing. I’ll live like this for like, two days, and see how I feel.”
And while Kim was busy working on herself, Kourtney was focused on someone else entirely: her new boyfriend. (While they don’t name drop the lucky guy, we can assume they’re probably referring to Younes Bendjima, the 24-year-old model whom she’s been seeing since early May.)
“I know Kourt has been out on the dating scene recently — she’s planning a little birthday surprise tonight,” Khloé explained. “I don’t really know the details, but she’s doing this whole exchange. She’s putting a hotel [room] key into this wallet.”
“I’ve never known Kourtney to be this giddy, ever in my life,” she added. “I’ve never known Kourtney to plan anything. It’s so cute though, to see her this giddy!”
Khloé said she knew “a little bit about this guy,” but was refraining from asking too many questions about him because Kourtney gets “super awkward” and “like, will shut down.”
The surprise seemed to go off without a hitch — but the following morning, Kourtney was typically evasive about it all, refusing to give her sisters any details about the night.
“Kourtney is always coy about what she does,” Khloé said.
“Doesn’t say a word, doesn’t divulge anything,” Kim said.
“It’s really good — I wish we were more like that,” Khloé added.
And as for Khloé? Well, she was busy trying to nail down mom Kris Jenner for some much-needed one-on-one time.
“You know, I’m kind of thinking that I got bamboozled into you moving to Cleveland,” said Kris, 61, of her daughter’s relocation to Cleveland, where her boyfriend Tristan Thompson plays for the Cavaliers.
“You made it sound like you were going to Cleveland for the weekend, and you’ve kind of gone to Cleveland for six months,” Kris said.
“I go back and forth constantly — it sucks,” Khloé admitted.
Luckily, the mother-daughter duo got to enjoy some quality bonding time, involving plenty of wine and a few prank calls. In their own words, cheers to that!
This article originally appeared on PEOPLE