CONTENT WARNING: This article discusses themes of depression, disordered eating, and domestic violence.
The best day of Jelena Dokic’s life came when her first book Unbreakable was published in 2017. “It changed my life,” she explains to WHO.
“My healing started and me living – not just existing – started with Unbreakable. There was no more secrecy, there was no more hiding, all of it was out in the world. All this weight was lifted off my shoulders and that’s the power of sharing our stories.”
The stories that Dokic, the former world No. 4 tennis star, told in that memoir were horrifying. She revealed years and years of ongoing physical and mental abuse at the hands of her father, Damir. He beat her until she lost consciousness, kicked her, starved her and ultimately left her battling depression and suicidal thoughts. But there was more to tell.
Teaming up again with journalist Jessica Halloran, Dokic wrote Fearless: Finding the Power to Thrive in 2023. In it she details, for the first time, her disordered eating, which she traces back to trauma from her childhood as a Serbian refugee and her father’s weaponisation of food, which could see her go from eating 10 meals a day to starving herself for almost a week. And she reveals the heartbreak she endured when she split with her partner of almost 20 years, Tin Bikic, which intensified her binge eating and left her suicidal.
Now, over seven years since she first told the world her story, Dokic and Halloran have delved deeper into her defining life experiences in her new documentary Unbreakable: The Jelena Dokic Story.
The film, which explores Dokic’s rise in the tennis world, sheds light on her relationship with her abusive father, her recovery journey, and its profound impact on her life.
“I remember [my father] was so mad that he goes into the bathroom with me, locks the door, and he beat the crap out of me. e slammed my head against the wall multiple times. He was kicking me. My shins were so bruised, I couldn’t walk. He actually punches me in the head. And then I went unconscious for a little bit,” she shared in the film.
Despite being the victim of horrific, ongoing abuse, Dokic believes that she has found strength, power, and purpose in bravely sharing her story.
“I don’t blame anyone. I don’t resent anyone. I definitely don’t hate anyone, never would,” the 41-year-old told the Herald Sun ahead of the film’s release.
“I’m not bitter about it. Even to my father, which people find surprising. But I don’t hate him. I don’t necessarily forgive him, but I don’t hate him.”
Reflecting on her journey, the 41-year-old previously told WHO, “I felt like there was a lot of things still to talk about and a lot of things that I was learning and I was still growing as a person.”
“I know that this can have a positive impact on people. I have discovered the power of sharing our stories and speaking up not just for myself but for others. I see it every day. I see it in my talks, I see it in the people that I meet. If it even helps just one person that’s all that’s important to me at the end of the day. I really think this is my legacy and if I can help as many people as I possibly can, and to continue doing that for the rest of my life, then I will die a very happy person.”
As well as recovering, Dokic is discovering. Single since the heartbreaking split with Bikic in early 2022, she says she can now see a time when she will be ready to find love again. But not yet. For now she’s learning to love life and herself on her own.
“I’m probably the happiest I’ve ever been to be honest,” she says. “I’m liking the way things are right now. I’m someone who has never even lived alone, so I’m liking that part and discovering it. It was a bit difficult at first but now I’m actually enjoying it. I like the way things are. I’m fully focussing on the things that I love, things I’ve never done before and so much work – which I love.
“I’m not shutting the door about finding love and being with someone because I do believe in it,” she adds. “I believe in love and I like being in a relationship and I like to be in love at a thousand miles an hour. I would love to be able to find that again, to be able to give that to someone. But if I’m being completely honest, I’m not ready for that. I’m OK with the way things are right now. I’m discovering every single day, more and more, about myself. Am I hopeful of finding love? Absolutely in the future – but just not right now.”
From living in fear to finding her voice to speak out, Dokic says much of her strength has come from her vulnerability. She has taken on the trolls and online commenters head-on when they came after her with slurs and venom about her weight gain. She applauds that body image activist Taryn Brumfitt is 2023’s Australian of the Year and will continue to take a stand against body-shaming. She will keep being fearless.
“There is strength in vulnerability – not just for myself,” she explains. “I think how you conquer fear is by being courageous and brave. I used the expression ‘fearless’ for my book because it’s a look on the court that you talk about when you’re a tennis player, so I kind of combined that as the tennis player and also the person who I am today.
“I’m still very proud of what I was able to do as an athlete, especially under the circumstances,” she adds. “A lot of times I was scared and I was afraid. I was afraid for my life, and not just from the abuse by my father but from my own mental health and almost committing suicide. But I feel I went through it by being brave and courageous and going through it fearlessly. If I wasn’t unbreakable and fearless and courageous and brave, I wouldn’t have been able to get through a lot of the things that happened.”
If you or anyone you know has been affected by the issues raised in this article, help is always available. For support, please call the Butterfly Foundation on 1800 334 673, 1800RESPECT on 1800 737 732, or Lifeline on 13 11 14.
