Nick ‘Honey Badger’ Cummins, the former rugby union star turned undie pitchman and soundbite machine will be the sixth man to present roses on Ten’s The Bachelor.
Inspired. Odd. Predictable. Unexpected. Delightful. Yes, all those words apply to Nick’s anointment. But to quote Shangela from the third season of RuPaul’s Drag Race: All-Stars, “Halleloo!”
Once WHO confirmed the news, I had images floating in front of me, all Benedict Cumberbatch-as-Sherlock-like, of the kinds of group dates the Honey Badger would go on, like The Ultimate Undergarments Photo Shoot, or Catch the Ball with Awkward Personal Questions Attached Game, or Match the Shampoo with the Conditioner.
Forget mundane pronouncements like, “I’ve been waiting for someone to come on this journey with me,” or “Will you accept this rose?” That old saw? Please.
Imagine it—a candlelit dinner, the moon shimmering over a bay, and a frisson of romance in the air. At that precise moment, just before a kiss, a woman waits for the words she longs to hear: “Holy tomorra! How good? Bloody, you beauty!”
And how they will ever contain Nick’s ripped frame in the standard issue rose-delivery uniform known as a suit and tie will be a wardrobe stylist’s own personal Rubik’s cube.
Yet as a longtime Bachie watcher and reporter, who attended and covered original Bachelorette Trista’s wedding to Ryan in 2003 and just spoke to Matty J and Laura after their recent South African holiday idyll, I know those who venture onto reality television for love sometimes do indeed find it.
But I’ve also interviewed many hopefuls—like Sophie Monk—who try to reconcile what’s good for them on paper with what’s good for them full stop and come up short, leaving heartbreak in their wake, and our chance to see Jarrod on Bachelor in Paradise. Wait. Who ended up with the good deal there?
Yet everyone knows they are making television.
So yes, I and others are hoping love comes to the Honey Badger. But we also know the Honey Badger will make for good TV.