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Questions like: “What should I write in my dating profile?”, “How should I respond to this flirty text?” and “What should I write in my wedding vows?” were once reserved for friends and family, but increasingly more of us are using ChatGPT for relationship advice.
Already, OpenAI estimates ChatGPT amasses around 800 million weekly users, with 49 per cent using the chatbot as an adviser.
“AI is giving people a new space to rehearse conversations, clarify their thoughts and find language for emotions they struggle to express,” psychologist Breanna Jayne Sada, who also hosts the podcast Let’s Reconnect, tells WHO.
“But it also introduces a layer of curation; people may begin editing their communication rather than speaking more naturally.”
Despite how handy it can be, Breanna warns AI may start shaping relationships in subtle ways.
Can ChatGPT help with conflict in relationships?
Roughly 90 per cent of couples argue – we truly believe that the other 10 per cent are lying. For some, ChatGPT has become a relationship therapist in times of conflict.
“Stepping away from a conflict where one or both of you are feeling dysregulated or threatened, so you can cool down, gain perspective or clarify what you want to say, is always a good idea because our brains are not really capable of listening and thinking rationally when we’re overwhelmed or really heated,” Christine Rafe, Lovehoney’s sex and relationship expert, tells WHO.
“Using AI as part of this process could be useful if it allows for emotional regulation or a better awareness of what’s actually going on for you during conflict.”
However, Christine warns that if you’re using AI as a replacement or to avoid difficult conversations, it will impact how you and your partner understand one another.
“Conflict is not just about solving a problem, it’s also about learning how to stay connected to yourself and your partner while emotions are high,” she tells us. “No AI can do that for you.”
Listen to WHO’s new vodcast The Group Chat to learn more about using ChatGPT for dating advice:
So, what’s the problem with using ChatGPT for relationship advice?
When couples start to rely on AI in relationships, it becomes an extra presence.
“Psychologically, that means another influence is entering the relational space, one that isn’t emotionally invested, doesn’t share the couple’s history and isn’t accountable for outcomes,” Sada explains.
“AI is also designed to be affirming of the user, and therefore this third presence will always side with the person doing the input, which may make honest self-reflection almost impossible if you have AI telling you your behaviour was appropriate or called for.”
While this isn’t inherently negative, it causes a dynamic shift.
“Healthy relationships rely on vulnerability and emotional risk-taking,” she says.
“If AI becomes the default interpreter or problem-solver, partners may miss opportunities to build these skills with each other.”
How is ChatGPT impacting the early stages of dating?
Outside of committed relationships, AI’s influence is also bleeding into the dating sphere.
Just one swipe through Hinge or Tinder and a range of perfect – read: robotic – bios pop up.
While this is getting daters to say something beyond “pineapple doesn’t belong on pizza” or “I’ll fall for you if you trip me”, Rafe notes AI’s use in early dating can lead to an inauthentic connection.
Per Hinge’s 2025 D.A.T.E. report, 84 per cent of Gen Z Hinge daters want to find new ways to build deeper connections with their dates.
However, daters are 36 per cent more hesitant than millennials to initiate a deep conversation – making outsourcing said deep conversations to AI understandable.
“When people present a polished version of themselves over text that’s based on the advice of AI, the person they’re texting is not getting to know the real person,” Christine tells us.
“This can create a sense of closeness that feels amazing but is not grounded in reality.”
Additionally, Christine warns that the use of AI-assisted messages and advice can accelerate intimacy well before either party is actually ready.
“How people show up to dating or what they share physically and emotionally is unique to every person and likely based on things like previous experiences, awareness and beliefs about sex and dating, and, most importantly, the felt sense of the person they’re dating.”
The bottom line
While many of us have – begrudgingly – accepted that AI is becoming the new normal, Breanna says it shouldn’t replace the messy, vulnerable and human parts of relationships.
“The goal isn’t to remove discomfort but to have the skills to navigate it,” Breanna says.
“If AI helps someone feel more regulated before a conversation, that’s useful. But the real connection still happens between people, not through a screen.”
