Sex & Relationships

Most Common Fetishes: A Comprehensive List Of Kinks

BDSM. Here’s our list of the most common kinks and fetishes.
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Although the kink community isn’t a huge fan of it, the Fifty Shades of Grey film franchise opened up the underground world of BDSM to the mainstream. Since then, kink has enjoyed a huge boom in popularity – or perhaps people are just more open to talking about it now.

Getting into kink is intimidating for any newcomer, partly due to the fact that there are just so many kinks, it’s overwhelming! Before we take a look at some of the most common fetishes, let’s breakdown what kink means in the first place.

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What Does Kinky Mean? What Is A Fetish?

The tricky thing about defining “kink” and “fetish” is that it changes depending on who you ask. For some people, dirty talk or anal could be considered kinky. For others, it’s not kinky until the whips and chains come out.

This is because “kinky” sex is any sexually arousing act that is considered “unconventional” or “out of the norm”. And what constitutes the “norm” varies from person to person, place to place, and generation to generation.

Fetish, on the other hand, is a little bit easier to define. If you have a fetish, it means that you find a particular body part (like the breasts), act (like smoking), or object (like bra & panties) sexually arousing. In most cases, the person with the fetish cannot be sexually excited without the presence of that object or part.

“Weird” Fetishes & Kinks: Demystified

We’ll get into our list of fetishes and kinks in just a bit. But first, we have to stress that this list of kinks is by no means everything. If you can imagine it, there’s probably a kink for it.

It’s also important to remember that some people might just have one kink, while others may have multiple kinks that overlap and intertwine. And whether you’re the former or the latter, you’re still kinky!

Now, let’s get started. Are you ready?

Age Play

Age play is a kink where one or more people enjoy roleplaying a different age than what they actually are. One sub-variant is the DDlg (or Daddy Dom, little girl) kink, where one partner plays the role of a dominant caregiver while the other plays the role of a younger more submissive person. Punishments/discipline and rewards/praise are common with this kink.

BDSM

Bondage/Discipline, Dominance/Submission, Sadism/Masochism – that’s what BDSM stands for. BDSM covers a WIDE range of practices that usually deal with pain and/or power. But be careful about conflating kink and BDSM; many kinks fall outside of the definition of bondage, D/s, and S/M.

Man on all fours looking a woman's shoe
(Credit: Getty)

Breath Play

Breath play or breath control is a sexual practice where you control, limit, or completely block someone’s breathing for a period of time. The most common form of breath play is choking with hands. Breath play is considered extremely dangerous and can even be fatal if done incorrectly, so always proceed with caution!

CBT

CBT stands for cock and ball torture, a kink practice that involves inflicting physical pain on male genitalia. This could be through using your foot to trample or crush the balls, chastity devices, whips, circumcision, or anything else you could think of.

Just like many other kinks, CBT could result in some major damage. Start off slow and work your way up as you learn about you or your partner’s limits!

Electric Play

Electric play is the practice of using electrical devices to sexually stimulate yourself or someone else. This usually involves the use of zappers, wands, and even TENS units! Electric play is a more extreme form of sensation play, which is focused on producing pleasurable sensations that aren’t necessarily painful.

Exhibitionism/Voyeurism

Exhibitionism and voyeurism are two sides of the same coin. Exhibitionists get aroused by showing off their bodies or committing sexual acts while others watch. Voyeurs get aroused by doing the watching.

This is one of those kinks that is relatively easy to pull off since it doesn’t require any special knowledge or tools. But if you’re going to participate in exhibitionism or voyeurism, make sure that the other parties involved have consented!

Food Play

Adding food to your sexual routine is a common way to spice things up. It’s not unusual to read something like: pour chocolate syrup over their bodies and then clean it up – with your tongue! in a magazine. But some kinksters take it up to 11 with feederism, a fetish where individuals enjoy eating or feeding someone large amounts of food.

Woman holding and licking red strawberry
(Credit: Getty)

Foot Fetish

We as a society joke about it all the time, but foot fetishes are the most common fetish out of all, accounting for about 47% of body-related fetishes (legs, hair, armpits, and bellybuttons are also top contenders).

A foot fetish could (but not always) extend to stocking, socks, shoe fetishes, where boot worship (yes, it’s exactly what it sounds like) is typical.

Humiliation/Degradation

While most people would be hurt, angry, or shocked at someone humiliating or degrading them, there are some people who gain sexual arousal or excitement from it. Erotic humiliation usually entails verbal degradation (e.g. insulting someone and calling them names) or humiliating acts (e.g. forcing a straight man to put on lipstick and wear a skirt).

Impact Play

Impact play is the umbrella term given to any kind of kink practice that involves, well, physical impact. Spanking, whipping, flogging, hitting, and caning are all examples of impact play. While a light slap on the behind isn’t very risky, impact play can go into dangerous territory unless you know where to hit and how hard you can safely go.

Leather

The leather subculture is wildly popular in the gay community, but it’s also become a sort of unofficial “uniform” for the kink community as well. While it is most commonly associated with kink and BDSM, you’re not limited to just wearing leather. Latex, satin, and lace are all “sexual” materials commonly used in the scene.

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Medical Play

Medical play could be something as small as roleplaying doctor and patient or as extreme as actually using medical tools in a scene. One of the most common kink toys is the Wartenberg wheel, a medical pinwheel device that’s used to test out nerve reactions…or to produce pleasurable sensations. Whichever works for you.

Pregnancy Fetish

It’s one thing to find your partner attractive while they’re pregnant, and it’s a whole different thing to find pregnancy in itself sexy. People with a pregnancy fetish may find their partners even more attractive than usual when they’re expecting. They may also be into lactation, breastfeeding, or other activities often associated with pregnancy.

Shibari

Better known to the Western world as rope bondage, shibari is the ancient Japanese art of restraining someone using rope or tying someone up. Shibari isn’t necessarily sexual, however; many people practice it merely as an art form or even as a performance.

Many kinksters and shibari artists spend years or even decades learning the knots, safety procedures, and decorative ties of Japanese bondage. As one of the more popular kink practices, there are many resources on the basics of rope bondage online.

Shibari Rope Bondage Performance
(Credit: Getty)

Swinging/Group Sex/Non-Monogamy

Yes, you read that right: threesomes are kinky. In a world that prizes commitment and monogamy, open relationships and group sex can be considered a kink. This is partly because many people within the BDSM community are also non-monogamous; while they may have a partner, they might also be allowed to “play” with people outside of their relationship.

But not all kinksters are non-monogamous. Many still enjoy long-term, one-on-one relationships as well.

Urophilia/Coprophilia

Urine and poop fetishes are obviously not everyone’s cup of tea, but there is a pretty substantial part of the community that enjoys being a “toilet” or using someone else as one. This is another one of the riskier kinks since it requires a lot of prep and sanitation. While similar, coprophilia is different from eproctophilia, which is being sexually aroused by farts.

Wax Play

To practice wax play, all you need are a few candles. Wax play entails the pouring of melted (hot) wax onto your or someone else’s body. It produces a warm, tingly, and sometimes painful sensation on the skin. Before you indulge in wax play, it’s essential to read up on the different types of candles you can use as well as how to properly (and safely) pour the wax.

Conclusion

Being “kinky” was once seen as a bad thing, but it’s slowly becoming more and more accepted. Still, most of these kinks are far from becoming mainstream.

And that’s okay!

Kink is not for everyone. What’s important is that we understand that kinksters are just like us – regular people who just have a different way of getting off.

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